Watery adventures

We are still here in the mountains, having a great time. I am not keeping with with anything online. We still don’t have an internet connection at our house. Right now I’m sitting outside the (closed) public library, using their wireless internet. Again.

Mr. Four is back at the house, and he’s probably tapping his foot waiting for me to get back since he’s stuck at the house without the car.

My mom was here last week, and we had a great time exploring some rivers and creeks. She left yesterday morning, and some of Mr. Four’s family arrived last night. Mr. Four’s brother is also an outdoorsy guy, so he brought a couple of canoes.

Mr. Four and I took the boys on their first (very mild) whitewater adventure last week: a canoe trip down a beautiful Class I-II river. They loved it until it rained. Then Bug freaked because he thought it would thunder and he’s scared of thunder. Giggle was fine until the rain turned chilly. We took off the river a little early, though Mr. Four and I were pretty much in hysterics at the absurdity of it all. “It’s not funny!” Giggle kept insisting.

We had even more fun yesterday when we went tubing on a creek in a national park near our house. Giggle had his own tube, tethered to Mr. Four’s, and Bug sat on my lap in our own big tube. I used my whitewater skills, honed from years of Class III, to get us unstuck from various rocks. The boys loved it. Bug narrated the whole trip–”Here come the waves!”–and Giggle proclaimed at the end of each run, “That was awesome!”

Mr. Four and I both agreed. It was about as much fun as I’ve ever had.

I have some work stuff to do over the next week, to get ready for some conference presentations, but I know Mr. Four, his family, and the boys will have a great time checking out more of the local waterways.

On another note: the boys just got their Christmas and birthday money from their grandfather, and we are thinking about buying them each a Leapster, especially for the flight home. Any suggestions, recommendations, etc. are welcome. Thanks!

Back in the USA

Phew. What a week it’s been. I am not going to write any more about the flights over as they are best left repressed deep within my brain.

Mr. Four arrived late last Friday night. Between our arrival and his, the boys and I did a lot. It was pretty crazy. We went shopping (Old Navy, Target, and Kohl’s, along with a dollar store and a funky local toy store), swam at the lake, swam at the pool, played baseball in the yard, hung out with my dad, celebrated my birthday, went to a great science museum, bought toys, attempted to eat out in restaurants, went to a movie, stocked up on College Town paraphenalia, chased fireflies, played with friends, visited with other friends, and ate pretzels and ice cream (though not at the same time).

Since Mr. Four’s arrival, we’ve done more of the same, but with a break here and there for me.

A couple of friends here have asked us how it feels to be back. The answer is that it feels totally normal to be back. Totally normal to be able to call my mom and dad and sister without advance planning or a check of the clock. Totally normal to walk on nice wide sidewalks. Totally normal to be able to buy soy products at the grocery store. Totally normal to have play dates with our old neighbors. Et cetera.

Of course what’s not normal is trying to cram a month’s worth of activities into a week’s time. Right now we’re in College Town, a charming area with lots of old friends and kid-friendly activities. In a few days, we head to the mountains, to a small cabin Mr. Four built there years ago. We have a lot of friends up there, including friends with kids, but we’ll be much more isolated. Mr. Four is envisioning canoeing on the lake with the boys. I hope we find enough to do. Giggle and Bug are both pretty interested in bugs these days, so maybe we can go bug hunting. Other ideas are also welcome!

What’s been most striking about our trip home is how much my kids had become city kids. Especially for the first few days, things that seemed utterly ordinary to me were quite remarkable to them. When we pulled into the driveway of the house where we’re staying, Giggle said the front yard, with a few trees, was like a forest. Every patch of trees became worthy of comment.

The next night they ran inside, terrified, screaming at me about some strange flashing lights which turned out to be fireflies (they got over this fear quickly).

They’ve loved seeing mailboxes and checking ours multiple times a day. Fire hydrants also earn a call out.

It’s been a bit rainy here, and Bug is particularly stressed by thunder. This was true last year when we lived in the US, but the absence of thunder from our lives has only increased his fear. I’ve never seen him so terrified. Any plane in the sky has him asking if it’s thunder. Suggestions for dealing with this particular fear are also welcome.

We’ll be mostly unplugged, I think, in the mountains. We have a TV there (our cabin is set up to be a vacation rental when we’re not in it), but no internet access except the public library. I’m looking forward to some long bike rides, now possible as Mr. Four was able to dig my road bike out of storage this morning, and lots of reading. Another big treat for me has been buying the Sunday New York Times, even though it took me all of last week to read it, and I still haven’t cracked this week’s.

I’ll post again before we head to the mountains. What are your questions about our time back in the States?

(Not) packing and more (not) packing

My cousin went south to Upper Egypt for a few days, which I thought would give me plenty of time to start packing. It has given me some time, but I have not done any packing. I’m sure you are as shocked as I am by this turn of events.

I did go shopping this weekend, with cousin K, at the Khan il Khalili, a big touristy market/bazaar in downtown Cairo. It was Saturday afternoon and hot as all get out. And of course I managed to wander us into the wrong neighborhood even though the Khan was about two inches away from us. We finally made it of course.

Giggle joined us willingly because he loves going new places and shopping (both boys got new Egypt/cartouche shirts, which had been hidden under the t-shirts of camels smoking shisha). Giggle kept complaining when we’d go into stores and not buy anything. I told him he had to pretend to be uninterested in things so we could bargain. He largely failed at this. Anyway, he’s very happy with his new shirt and has already worn it twice. I ended the day with a headache so throbbing that it took a shower, a couple of Tylenol, and a nap to make it go away. I’m just no good in the heat (to which you respond, then, pray tell, why do you live in Egypt? Which is a very good question).

Giggle and I also had a conversation this weekend about how no one is allowed to touch him if he doesn’t want them to. A very serious topic, indeed, but it started because Egyptian men seem compelled to touch his hair. And of course he doesn’t like it — would you? So now he knows to say “la! la-ah!” (no! really no!) when people touch him. Hair touching is a big issue in the African American community, and apparently it’s an issue for native born Africans in North Africa too. Seriously, folks, if you’re a hair toucher, you really should stop. It’s weird.

Deep down I have much anxiety about all the packing I need to do in the next few days. Packing for the States should be easy because the boys have new clothes waiting for us there, plus we’ll be going shopping, plus we can get anything we need there, plus we won’t really need all that much. But as a friend of mine used to say, “Should is a dangerous word.” (Okay, an old flame used to say that, and he probably still says it, but I haven’t talked to him in MANY years.)

I think really I’m anxious about the flights even though there’s nothing to be done except laugh instead of cry. A colleague of mine did tell me some horror stories yesterday about transferring at JFK from international to domestic. At most airports, when you land internationally, you collect your luggage, walk it through customs, and then toss it back on some carousel for the airport folks to transfer it to your next flight. But apparently at JFK you have to walk it to the next terminal. This guy told me that he has a distinct memory of pushing his trolley of bags uphill through a construction site (but at least not in the snow). And he didn’t even have two little boys with him. Eh, que sera sera. And maybe JFK is better now.

We leave on Saturday around noon. Giggle will watch every movie that plays, and listen to every in-flight music station. He’ll attempt to call the flight attendant multiple times and the flight attendants will ignore us. Bug will be harder to entertain but he is also more malleable. I’m also trying to get used the idea of being on my own, without Mr. Four, for the week. But I think I’ll keep us busy with swimming and visiting and movies. Hurray, movies! Will Kung Fu Panda be too much for Bug? Because Giggle and I would really like to see it.

Last night, the boys and I went to a local toy shop tonight to pick out a few things for the airplane (I said so many times that they wouldn’t get the toys until the airplane that Giggle started saying, “I know Mommy! It’s for the airplane!). We couldn’t find many small toys. So we bought some real cheapies that probably won’t last much past JFK, but the boys seemed happy enough until this morning, when Giggle cried because he wanted his new airplane toys. Bug has mostly forgotten about the new stuff or is taking “for airplane use only” very seriously.

Bug also decided last night that he’d rather be in the sling, really an Ergo baby carrier, on my back than in the stroller. He really likes being carried sometimes, especially in crowded places or when he’s tired, and I think the sling will work better for me as it’s more comfortable for longer distances than our basic little umbrella stroller. Plus he’ll be able to watch the crowds.

So, we’re not packed, but we’ve got some toys and made some very important decisions.

Today or tomorrow is my last day at work… probably tomorrow since I’ll have still have some stuff to finish up. That gives me two days to pack and plan and make sure I don’t forget anything important like my driver’s license. It’s so quiet at work many of my colleagues have already left for the summer.

The new flat

Mr. Four, Bug, Giggle, my cousin K (visiting from Texas), and I went to visit our new apartment tonight. Actually, it’s still someone else’s old apartment. The woman living there was super friendly and accommodating and was quite happy to have us pop over on the spur of the moment so we could see the place. She’s moving out by the end of June, so the house was apparently a bit chaotic (to parents of two little boys, it looked rather orderly).

Anyway, enough rambling. I am delighted with the new space! The flat occupies the ground floor of a building, and it has two patios, one on each end. The front of the apartment is one large room, the dining area and living room. The wall to the patio is actually all windows, so it lets in a good amount of light considering the patio outside is walled.

The kitchen is a decent size, a separate room, but at least with a window over the sink and a good amount of counter space and cupboards.

The flat has three bedrooms, all pretty big. The best part is that two of the bedrooms, on the back of the flat, also have walls of windows overlooking the second patio. And there’s enough privacy from the wall around the patio that we probably won’t need to close the curtains except for darkness. One of the bedrooms is the master (with its own bathroom!) and the other will be for the boys, with more space than their current room, which means they’ll have storage for books and some toys in there.

Also, the third bedroom is big enough to hold a double bed, which means you people can actually come visit now. Outside this bedroom is a second full bath, which is a great improvement over our current 1.5 baths.

Each bedroom has a real closet. And, here’s the real shocker: there’s a linen closet! And, a separate room just for the washing machine and storage!

Right outside the apartment door is a nice yard perfect for the kids and for the pup. Neither patio opens onto the yard. The patios are pretty big, as far as patios go. They are paved with square stones but the outside of each patio has a narrow garden, and the family has some lovely flowering trees and bushes that give some nice color. Actually, the walls are so high around the patios that the place is really private, especially for the ground floor.

My employer usually keeps the furniture in the same apartments unless major repairs are needed. So we checked out the new pieces, and I actually kinda like it. Our current furniture is pretty functional but not especially attractive. The stuff in our new flat is old enough that it actually seems kinda cool. A bit funky almost.

Oh, and did I mention the marble fireplace? I’m not sure we’ll use it, but it’s pretty. And not nearly as fancy as that sounds.

Anyway, I realize the details aren’t essential and probably don’t make much sense. The whole place is probably somewhere around 1500 square feet or so. The big gains for us are the outside space plus more storage space. And the layout seems to work well. And the location really is fantastic.

In sum: hurray!

Off to Croatia

On Sunday, I leave for six days in Croatia for… work! I have a professional meeting there. Here are two great things about this meeting: 1) It’s in Croatia, and, 2) Some friends and colleagues from my beloved alma mater will also be there.

The more I learn about Croatia’s coast on the Adriatic, the more I wished Mr. Four and I had decided to make this a family vacation. The airfare is expensive (mine is covered by work), though, and, at the time of booking, before Mr. Four had his job, we didn’t think we could swing it.

And, especially surprising given that Croatia isn’t really all that far from here, it’s quite a schlep to get there: my travels on Sunday will include four cities, three countries, and three airlines. I fly Cairo to Vienna to Zagreb to Dubrovnik. My layover in Vienna is long enough to be long but too short to zip into town and see anything, unfortunately.

I read once some silly thing like “you know you’re an expat when … you have at least three currencies in your wallet.” That’ll certainly be the case next week: I’ll have my Egyptian pounds for home, Croatian kuna, American dollars to convert (my per diem from my employer), and maybe a few euros so I can buy a snack in Vienna.

The conference is long — Monday to Friday — and I know I’ll miss Mr. Four and the boys. But what an amazing opportunity for me. And of course it is easier to be a tourist without kids. And I’m really looking forward to seeing my friends, especially one in particular, my old supervisor and a dear friend. Plus she’s bringing me treats from the US: magazines and swimmer’s shampoo!

We have a busy few weeks when I get back: my wonderful college-aged cousin is coming for two weeks (the first family to visit!), and we leave on June 21 for the States. We talked to my mom last night, to wish her a happy birthday (the boys sang “Happy Birthday” in English, my idea, and in Arabic, their idea). The night before, the boys talked to their Grandpop, Mr. Four’s dad. Now they are both ready to hop on that plane and see all these relatives. Me too.

But first, Croatia. This is one of these times when I feel like the luckiest girl in the whole world. I’ll try to post once or twice from there. Otherwise, see you in a week!

Oh, happy day

We interrupt this hiatus to wish you a very happy Mother’s Day… from we Fours to you, especially Grammie JJ, Aunt A, Nana, Graeme, Aunt Ci, Aunt Ch, and Aunt M.

It turns out I had a very nice Mother’s Day, even given that it’s a work day here in Egypt (as are all Sundays). Mr. Four and I had haircuts scheduled with a new friend and stylist, a British expat who used to own his own shop in England but sold it to follow his wife around the world. He came over this afternoon, and I hope my haircut looks as good on me as Mr. Four’s does on him.

I knew my present was to be delivered at 6:30pm. I figured it was a plant. A big plant, tree-like, but a plant all the same. So imagine my surprise when, at the end of my haircut, in walks a masseuse, there to give me a massage.

It was unexpected and wonderful. Very relaxing, even though Bug kept coming in the room to “help,” by rubbing my arm until Mr. Four chased him out. Both boys insist we’ve somehow been cheated, though, because the masseuse didn’t leave a present. They were looking for something to unwrap.

I’m not usually one for holidays (except my birthday, which, as a consequence, is often a disappointment), but this Mother’s Day had me reflecting on my first Mother’s Day as a mom, two years ago. Mr. Four and I arrived in Ethiopia on Mother’s Day, and we met little Bug for the first time the very next day. We were expecting a slow transition, but he ended up relaxing with us during the day (when he met us, first he cried, and then he fell asleep in my arms), so we took him back to our guest house with us, and he’s been with us ever since. A day or two later, Mr. Four gave Bug a little box to give to me, and the box held a charm necklace called a “mommy tag,” a silver chain with a charm bearing Bug’s name. It was very sweet. I wore it just about every day for ages. (Now I have other jewelry from Ethiopia that I also wear.)

I don’t remember Mother’s Day last year. It was a chaotic time: we were in the midst of awaiting news from Egypt about a job offer and, much more importantly, news from Ethiopia about a court date to process our adoption of Giggle. Both came through around the same time, a week or two after Mother’s Day, which is perhaps why the day itself is a blur.

So here I am in Egypt, spoiled silly and feeling neo-colonial with all this pampering, but also loving Mr. Four and my wonderful boys.

Back in Cairo

We’re back from a fantastic vacation. I left off blogging right before our trip to St. Catherine’s Monastery, which was great. The church itself is awe-inspiring, really old and dramatic and lovely. And on a hot day, the mountains were a nice cool break from the beach. Though of course we dove into the pool about two minutes after getting back to our hotel.

I’ll blog more about our trip once I get the photos loaded (which will probably take forever, as always; it’s not the downloading but the organizing and uploading which kills me). But the rest of the week also included lots of snorkeling with some colorful fish along with some pool side adventures. The kids ended up playing with some new friends from the UK, Germany, and France (including the kids of someone prominent enough to have a Wikipedia entry, which of course I didn’t know but only suspected until I got home and googled him).

Today is Easter here in Egypt, for Coptic Christians. It’s also Easter for Ethiopian Orthodox and Greek Orthodox Christians. So Happy Easter to you easterners.

Tomorrow, Monday, is Shem El Nessim, the Egyptian spring celebration. I’ll learn more about it and then pass along my wisdom to you. But it does mean I have tomorrow off, so I’ll go to the kennel and retrieve the pup, who, as the boys have been saying, has been on vacation with other dogs (okay, that’s what I told them). I hope he hasn’t been too traumatized by it all.

On Tuesday, Mr. Four starts his new job!

And since Thursday is the Egyptian Labor Day, I only have two days of work this week. Not bad for the first week back after a vacation.

We did get some sad news tonight: our old cat, the Jekyll/Hyde kitty, who has been living with my mom since last summer, died yesterday. By all accounts, she had become mostly a Hyde kitty and had left her biting, grouchy ways behind, and my mom, previously an avowed cat-disliker, really fell for her. My poor mom–over the past few years, she’s taken in three pets from my sister and me and overseen the death of two (who were old; my mom is not a pet serial killer).

A year ago Mr. Four and I had had five pets, three dogs and two cats. Both cats and one dog died from July to yesterday. They were all old and sick, but still.

The other two dogs are with other folks now (including one with my mom) and seemingly in good health for now.

We’ve also managed to lose a cat (and I don’t mean through death) here in Egypt. Maybe we’re bad news for animals.

Anyway, I’m not sure if I’ll even tell the boys about the Jekyll/Hyde kitty. Of course they both know her and remember her well. But Bug in particular has been extra attentive to death issues lately. When we went to St. Catherine’s, Giggle and Bug expressed an interest in playing with Moses (probably because I described him as an original super hero). We said they couldn’t play with Moses (or “Noses,” according to Bug), because he wasn’t there, he died a long time ago. So all day we heard “Noses died.” This is the same as happened after Iggy the cat died here in Egypt. And the same with after the Hound died last summer. Any advice on this one, folks?

Meantime, I have apparently resumed my night owl ways now that I’m back in Cairo. More soon, I promise. Now I need to go to bed and sleep off this vacation.

Some news, and off to Dahab

Mr. Four has a new job. He starts in a couple of weeks. This will mean big changes for all of us. He’ll be working part-time, but will have less time with the kids, unfortunately. We’re lucky to have a great housekeeper who will be doing more for us, especially nannying. I hope it won’t be too disruptive for the boys.

It also means we’ll have some extra money. We’ve been getting by fine on my salary, but another salary will be a huge help.

Mr. Four is really excited for this. He’s been quite happy to be home with the boys, but now he’s looking forward to an interesting job with interesting people.

And to celebrate his new job… we’re off to Dahab this weekend. Okay, we’ve been planning this trip for ages, but now it’s especially nice to have the time together as a family before Mr. Four begins his new job (just a few days after we get back to Cairo).

Dahab, on the Red Sea on the Sinai Peninsula, has the reputation of being a backpackers’ hang-out, though I think the true backpacker days are long gone. In any case, it’s supposed to have great character and great diving. Mr. Four is newly certified and these will be his first real dives. Plus I think we might be able to do some kiddie snorkeling for the boys. Maybe they’ll see Nemo.

I’m also hoping we can take a trip to St. Catherine’s Monastery at Mt. Sinai (yes, as in Moses) and take what’s here called a desert safari, which means hanging out with camels and Bedouin.

Mr. Four and I have traveled a bit over the past few years, but this is the longest real vacation we’ve taken since we went to the Everglades about four or five years ago (which was actually part work for Mr. Four so I guess that wasn’t even a real vacation either). And the first long vacation we’ve taken as a family.

Pupdate 2: Puppy in the Neighborhood

The puppy is still here and doing well. He’s growing fast, straight up, I think, as his legs appear longer and lankier every day. He could eat a horse (but mostly sticks to puppy food and rawhide). Most importantly, we’re seeing more of the puppy in him. Sometimes he runs around in crazy circles, and other times he likes to nibble on the edge of shoes, which, so far, is mostly cute because he can’t really do any damage yet.

He’s not a big tail wagger, and he’s still pretty mellow, so he’s more like puppy-lite.

Having the pup around has changed some of our patterns. Most days, after dinner, the boys and I take the puppy downstairs to the patches of lawn in front of our building. We tried walking him a couple of times, but he’s still too young to walk well on the leash, and the streets here are tough for leash training. So we’re content, for now, with the (so-called) garden.

Hanging out in the front of the building has meant that I’ve met more of my neighbors. And the boys have befriended a family from a few buildings down. The dad is a neighborhood bowab (a doorman/superintendent combo), and when they kids aren’t in school, they just hang out. So they like seeing my kids too.

They range in age from 3 to 12 years, four kids all together, all very friendly and very respectful. The boys particularly love O, who is 7, though originally I took him for 5 as he’s smaller than Giggle. Even without more than a few common words, they play great together.

We had the four kids all up to our apartment one night last week, and it was the easiest bunch of kids ever. Last weekend, we took three of the kids (O had disappeared with a friend into the neighborhood) and the kids’ mom to our neighborhood club with the pool. The mom, who does speak some English, said it was a huge treat because the kids usually don’t get to go anywhere.

The family is from Luxor in southern/Upper Egypt. They own two apartments down there, which are for the boys when they get married. The older daughter is 12, a very nice girl, and the mom said she’ll get married at age 14. Whoa.

So all this because of the pup. Unfortunately, Mr. Four still doesn’t want to keep him. I do (natch). Especially now that he’s getting stronger and healthier and we’re having more fun with him. But, we we’re looking for a new home for him since I’m not the one at home most of the time.

So that’s the latest on the pup.

Around the web

I have about three big posts brewing, but until I have time to finish them up, I did want to share some interesting things I’ve read over the past few days.

Michael Slackman of the New York Times has an article today about noise in Cairo. Don your ear mufflers, and read A City Where You Can’t Hear Yourself Scream.

A young Egyptian woman named Pakinam wrote a powerful blog entry on her decision to wear hijab: To Veil or Not to Veil.

Jae Ran at the great blog Harlow’s Monkey gives some great advice to parents on how we can be allies to our transracially adopted kids.